Thank God That I Had You
by JoeLies
Summary: It's irrelevant to dwell on the past, I'm accountable for what went bad and I mean that. But I keep on praying for another chance, just to have you back because I've grown and I know how to be your everything.
1. Little Red Box

_Ransacking his old room, Ephram put a stack of books and magazines into one of the three packing cases, spreading around the room. Kneeing down again, he stopped and detected a little box in the hindmost part of his closet. He contemplated to leave it untouched but finally he grabbed the little oblong box and opened it slowly. It was the present he had slated to present Madison around three years ago. It wasn't just a present. It was an everlasting memory of his deceased mother. He starred at the present for what seemed like forever without a movement and remembered the day his mother had given him this memory and finally he realized what he had really missed in the last years and came to a conclusion._

He stood right in front of a white door to Apartment 354 and he felt his heart pounding like mad. As recently as six hours ago he had found the red little box in the hindmost part of his closet and now he stood right in front of this apartment in the city of NY. He cleared his throat and took a deep breathe and finally pressed the bell. Waiting for an answer, Ephram fixed his hair and his jacket again and glanced through a big window right beside him and watched the spectacle in the sky. It seemed like the white clouds would clear the way for the bright rays of the summer sun and he couldn't help smiling about this spectacle. It gave the impression like his mother was very proud of her little boy.

'Can I help you?' The door opened and a young woman stepped forward. Smiling amused, she shook him softly to awake him. Ephram shook his head to come clear and eyed her up and realized that she was the occupant of Apartment 354.

'Sorry, I just watched this beautiful spectacle in the sky,' he said, collecting his thoughts and pointed at the white clouds outside.

'Yeah, it is amazing!' The young woman whispered stunned, walking over to the window to gaze at the movements in the sky. 'So what can I do for you?'

'Actually I'm searching for Madison Kellner. I searched in a phone directory and it said she'd live here!' he enlightened, looking in the green eyes of the young woman and eyed her up. She looked good. She had long dark brown hair and wore a usual denim jeans and a light blue sweater.

'You're right, she's living here but she isn't in. She has classes today. I've never seen you before, who are you?' she uttered and gave him a puzzled look.

'Uhm, I'm an old friend from Everwood,' he explained, starring at the young woman.

'I'm Taylor, her roommate. Would you like to leave her a message?' she asked and leant against the doorframe and crossed her arms.

'No-no, my flight goes in two hours,' he said depressed and bowed his head. 'Darn my luck! I'm dogged by bad luck!' He tried to smile but found it suddenly difficult.

'Oh, it can't be that bad!' she said happily, trying to cheer him up. 'What's that? Madison has not birthday yet, has she?'

'Oh no, she hasn't but…' he hesitated. It was difficult to speak with the lump swelling in his throat. He swallowed. 'But I thought she should get it.' His voice shook as sensitive thoughts floated back into his mind. Ephram sighed.

'I don't know what you exactly mean,' she said puzzled and starred at him. He looked insecure and unwell and she didn't know why. She didn't say or do anything wrong.

'It's a long story! I should go now.' Ephram's cheeks felt hot. He swallowed the thick brackish knot in his throat. He never thought he could like this in his life so he decided to go and not to show his pain. Quickly jumping downstairs, he was put the little oblong box into the inner pocket of his jacket. He left the apartment building and leant against the wall, covered his face with his hands and let out a sigh of relief but it was also a sigh of evaporated hope.

Suddenly the sky turned dark and wrapped the shining blue in mystery and a couple of minutes later it started to rain and Ephram began to run. He ran through the streets of NYC to find a safe hideout and while he was running it seemed like he'd have ran through his past. All the memories of the family they once had been, rushed through his mind and he felt a buzzing in his head. He ran until he couldn't anymore and stopped under a sunblind of a little coffee shop. He laid his hands on his head and tried to cushion his memories, his thoughts and the buzzing but it didn't work. He looked at his watch and realized he had only one and a half hour until he'd fly back into his ordinary life, far away from his mother and predetermined life. He opened his jacket to be sure that the present was still there and turned round. He promptly recognized the coffee shop, it was the shop Madison and he had sat in around two years ago.

He hesitated for a couple of moments but then he entered and let himself overflowed by the memories he had and sat down at one of the tables and pulled a notepad and a biro out of his shoulder bag and began to write, he wrote everything he had to say. It was hard to hold his tears back but it seemed to be harder as he thought. His blue eyes were blurred with tears and his chin trembled but he refused to give into weakness.

He tore the handwritten letter into a white envelope and put it into his pocket. He had written around one hour and had only a half hour to go so he jumped off and ran out of the coffee shop. He made his way across the streets, through the Central Park and stopped in front of the apartment building he had been in a couple of hours ago.

He flagged down a taxi and got in, looking at the apartment building until he couldn't see it anymore. He watched the people on the busy streets, the nursery-school teacher with a group of kids in tow, the pizza deliverer and the eco-market salesman who cleaned the homegrown vegetables and the hackies who tried to pull off a job. Finally they arrived to the airport and Ephram ran inside and checked in. Now he'd step back into his ordinary life, far away from NYC, away from his mother and his predetermined life.


	2. His Letter

Jumping upstairs, Madison slipped her gray beige coat off and unlocked the door to her apartment. Looking around to be sure she was alone, she opened the envelope and pulled out a letter. She hesitated and starred at the little red box in her right hand. She exactly remembered the day she actually should have received this present to her 21st birthday and she exactly knew from who this letter was.

She sat down at the table right beside the big window with a panoramic view of the skyline of Manhattan and slowly unfolded the letter. She couldn't help smiling when she saw his neat handwriting and started to read.

_My dearest Madison,_

_I'm sitting in the little coffee shop we had been in around two years ago and it's still raining. I guess I should just start at the beginning and tell you how I ended up here. I'm living in an apartment beyond the reach of my dad now and I collected my stuff from my old room when I found this, your present in the hindmost part of my closet. _

_Oh my god, Maddie. It has been so long since I've seen you and suddenly everything inside me awoke when I held the box in my hands. It wasn't just a present for you. No, it was more, much more than that. I loved you so much and my heart broke in two when you broke up. I know you got through so much the last years and I wish I had been there but I wasn't. I wish I had held your hand but I didn't. Do you remember my call? I said you were a big piece of my everything but now I know you're my everything. I wish you were here to hold my hand now._

_I know I've missed the most horrified years in your life and I know that you changed and you're living a different life now, possibly you're engaged or you're dating someone. I'm although familiar with that you couldn't keep crying over me, so I'm not mad about you if you won't answer this letter. I'm not a piece of your life anymore but that's so hard to believe and I think it'll take a little time to realize. Actually, I don't know why I'm writing this letter. Possibly it's just to let you know about my feelings._

_We've seen our share of ups and downs. How quickly life can turn around in an instant. You always reached out to me and helped me believe. All those memories we share I will cherish every one of them. The truth of it is there's a right way to live and you showed me. Just when fear blinded me  
you taught me to dream. I won't see your smile and I won't hear you laugh anymore. I'd like to look in your green eyes right now and say I love you. I'll never forget you. I'll never let you out of my heart. You will always be here with me. I'll hold on to the memories. I'll always think of you and smile and be happy for the time I had you with me._

_  
Wherever you may be tonight are you near me. I need you to be by my side because I've never said  
goodbye. Somewhere I know you'll be with me. Someday in another time but right now you're gone. You just vanished away but I'll never leave you behind. I'd give you everything. There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do to ensure your happiness. Ok, now I'm crying, I should stop now but there's so much more I have to say. I'm overwhelmed with gratitude. I'm so thankful I had you in my life._

_It's irrelevant to dwell on the past. It happened but I keep on praying for another chance just to have you back because I've grown and I know how to make it right. Maybe we could make that dream for real like way back then when love was yours and mine, maybe we could bring it back to life. It ain't over yet. I know you're my destiny. If we try one more time maybe somehow we'll survive._

_In everlasting love, Ephram_

Madison wiped away her tears after she finished reading. She couldn't believe he felt that way, he still loved her and he wished to hold her hand. There was nothing to prefer than to hold his hand right now. She got up and folded the letter and put it aside. She couldn't believe that he had been there just a couple of hours ago. She booted her laptop and immediately booked a flight to Denver. She had to look in his eyes after all that, she had to face him just for a couple of minutes.


End file.
